Halloween just came and went and Christmas already dominates the retail sphere. I personally don’t mind it. Despite not following the Christian faith, I’ve always loved the season’s festivity. My inner drama queen adores the theatrical element—bright decorations, children’s glitter-and-cotton-ball art, and carolers in costume. Mostly I appreciate how happiness becomes a priority. People put aside their petty differences and commit small acts of kindness. Perhaps it’s the selfless nature of giving that creates this energy. When you imagine grandma cradled in a recliner enjoying the back massager you bought her you feel a more immediate connection to the frail woman who needs help on the bus.

The holidays awaken a vulnerability that many of us guard throughout the year. Since consumerism flavors the season—and we often connect the joy we share with parties we host, food we provide, and gifts we give—I wonder how many people will hold onto that guard. I say let it down. Here’s how I think you can do it, despite financial limitations:

5. Learn not to compete with the past. My mom throws extravagant parties with enough food to do her Italian heritage proud, and enough liquor to keep guests smiling even if the lasagna’s a little burnt. If she couldn’t host functions this grand I suspect she wouldn’t do it at all. That’s a mistake. This is a perfect time to practice letting go of your ego. It will inspire others to do the same. Plan it pot-luck-style. Ask people to bring their own beer. Hound your wealthiest friend to give you money. (OK, you probably won’t do that. How about asking him to send me some?) The point is: don’t let limitations close you off. Of all the things you sacrifice your heart should be the last.

 

4. Become more creative…and start early! I admit I feel cool when I get my gifts at Sharper Image, but I also feel cool when I can buy lunch (kind of a priority). If you’re crafty you can create amazing gifts. Usually right around the beginning of November I start crocheting blankets and scarves for Christmas presents. I also think about other gifts I can make, like photo slideshows for my grandparents. If you’re not the DIY type these presents will be even more meaningful.

 

3. Use reality as a teaching tool. People often see hardship as a road block, but I take a different approach. My favorite quote reads, “Reality is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I deal with it.” I know—it sounds kind of touchy-feely—but perception really is everything. If you’re a parent this is a wonderful time to teach your children about budgeting and the economy. Make it an adventure. When you’re shopping for your Thanksgiving meal, create mini-contests: who can find the lowest-priced cranberry sauce? Who can find festive napkins that costs under $4? Who can make Mommy a Perfect Cosmopolitan when we get home? (Kidding…kind of.)

 

2. Let your friends off the hook. The holidays are all about good will and compassion, so think outside your own gift box. Everyone wants to impress their friends and family. Make it easy to do that by creating a gift list online, perhaps at Today I Wish that contains low-cost or even re-gifted items. Imagine how relieved your sister will feel when she reads your number 1 item: my sister’s brownie recipe, ingredients, and a bowl.

 

1. Think bigger. Sounds like a contradiction, right? It’s not. Think of it as Costco-style event planning. Your family, your sister’s, and your brother’s might all have separate holiday dinners.  If you do it all together and split the costs you can all save a little cash. Pick the sibling with the biggest home and then plan separate tables with adults and kids. Maybe the youngest ones will sit around the coffee table. Maybe people will eat at different times. Maybe you’ll all cram around one table like it’s a clown car. Who knows—you can make it work. 

Maybe some of these aren’t realistic for you, or perhaps they don’t even apply because you’re independently wealthy and unscathed by the challenging times. Whatever the case may be, I say stay open—in fact, open up more. Now’s the perfect time to be more than what you can afford and buy.