by Lori Deschene
Everyone knows the economy sucks right now, so I’ll spare you another impassioned tirade against the rising cost of gas. Who needs a reminder we could all be showering in our sprinklers soon? Not me—that’s for sure. What I need is money, and lots of it. So I can buy more things, of course.
I did a little searching for some creative, off-the-wall, and—in some cases—just plain dumb things real people have done to save or make money. Here’s what I came up with:
Fox News reported a nationwide increase in women donating eggs, which are worth $3,500–$7,000 each. Bear in mind you have some competition. Indian clinics take credit cards and advertise young, fertile women who “have superovulated just for you.” How can American ovaries possibly compete?
You’re uniquely positioned (in your backyard, up a tree, with binoculars) to see what they own that’s valuable and when they leave it unattended. I know; it goes against Judeo Christian ethics—but if thou want the new iPhone, thou will get over that real fast.
Angelina Spencer, National Executive Director of the Association of Club Executives notes that more women are becoming pole dancers to deal with financial woes. Unfortunately, the industry isn’t immune to the bad economy. One club owner says his business is down by 25 percent. You probably don't want to go there anyways. The glass ceiling is surprisingly low—and you’ll probably hit it frequently as you shimmy up the pole.
Food and parenting writer Keri Fisher shares a house with her sister, both their husbands, and their combined seven children to save on bills. They even drive around as a big happy family in a 15-passenger cargo van. Which will likely encourage the children to start walking to school, further reducing fuel costs. Once again—a gift that keeps on giving.
Contrary to popular belief, begging can get you way more than a Big Mac and a beer. A police survey says panhandlers outside Wal-Mart in Coos Bay, Oregon, can make up to $300 a day—which is $292.50 more than the average Wal-Mart employee earns.
According to the Central New York News, gamblers are looking for local spots instead of traveling to resort casinos. Because it’s outrageous to spend $100 on gas when you could lose that in the slots, instead.
The virtual world known as Second Life appears to be booming despite the economic downturn, growing 15 percent from the last quarter of 2007 to the first quarter of 2008. German-based Anshe Chung buys fake plots of land, develops them into fake communities with fake houses, and then resells those to Second Life players. Her virtual worth translates to over $250,000 US dollars. Real dollars.
2007 estimates reveal there are over 100 million websites, many of them selling really dumb things. Case in point: Lucky Break Wishbone. The company manufactures plastic wishbones, and even sells them in bulk—up to 400 in a package. Just in case your 800 children want to battle for a wish simultaneously.
American Kennel Club spokesperson Lisa Peterson says dognapping is on the rise, noting that thieves keep them, gift them, sell them, or just hold out for posters offering reward. To make it real simple, look for unattended children with puppies. Just steer clear of seeing-eye dogs if you can—‘cause that would just be wrong.
This one won’t affect you directly, but it just may help your state. Studies from the Williams Institute for California and New Jersey project over $82 million in revenue from gay marriage within the next three years. So what if you’re straight. Take one for the team.
posted @ Thursday, August 14, 2008 10:14 AM